Thursday, September 25, 2008

Memories

The only difference between you and I are our memories and one more important factor: which is how we interpret them.

Any number of bad or good experiences can come into our lives and influence them. But what becomes of us when it happens to us?

I cannot judge any person because, there are times that I've thought myself as a nice person but instances at times have proved that I am very much a flawed person.

So when I read about a friend stabbing his wife, who knows? There but for the grace of God go I.

Memories are also the reason why adults have a harder time, I think, learning something new, like computers, because a voice in their head has been programmed to scold them if they make a mistake, stunting them from trying new things with free abandon.

A child takes to a computer because there's no memory to scold them, no fear of failure, of being reprimanded for making a mistake or punishment.

Someone asked me, in an interview, how do I deal with difficult people. I replied something off my head from the book I was reading, "Becoming a person" that we should accept them and by accepting them it makes it easier to change them for them to change.

Thinking about it, I realize that I hardly use the term "difficult people". There's only problems. Because to the boss, his employees are difficult, but to the employees, the boss is the one being unreasonable.

And what is the difference between me and "difficult people"? Only our memories, our experience and our perspective. So in order to solve problems communication in understanding others is important. Remember Stephen R. Covey's 5th habit, "Seek first to understand and then to be understood."

It's very interesting, because this is where theology and psychology overlap. Who am I before God? My talents are not mine, they are gifts. If I were to be born in another continent, country, town or even household, I may have turned out different. Who are we to judge our fellow man?



Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Sacrifice is Gain

The meaning of sacrifice is to "make holy". But it doesn't mean the disregard of loss. It is a meaningful, determined act of the will.

Sacrifice is the giving up of something of value on one plane of existence for something better on another plane, even the spiritual.

Sacrifice means exchanging something of value on earth, money, promotions, sex, houses ,etc, for integrity, for love, truth, true beauty, virtue.

Sacrifice doesn't mean giving up of something for nothing. It is still an exchange of net gain. To not gain something is foolishness. But not of gain in the eyes of the world but in the eyes of a higher and greater power and being.

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Living Life

One thing that I've been learning over the past few days is that life is about becoming not just doing.

We do things because of who we are, because of our identity.

But our identity isn't static. Each action, thought and word we say moves us towards becoming the person we were designed to be.

Stress comes from the difference between our ideal self and our actual self. When there is a difference between it.

There is a problem when society, the external forces wants to move us towards a direction that isn't our who we are. There is this ideal image that society creates that we are pressured to strive for that is different from what we are. This incongruity, this tension between who we really are and who we are "supposed" to be creates stress.

To counter this, we acknowledge truth, live in the present being totally aware of what is happening and making choices according to the best wisdom that we have, tapping the rational Adult ego that we have inside.