Live Life With No Regrets!

Go to the ant, you sluggard; consider its ways and be wise! (Proverbs 6:6)

Most scientists consider brain size one of the most important things in a the development of a creature, yet ants have brains smaller than a grain of sand and create some of the most complex structures in the animal kingdom.

How do they do it? Did the queen call out for tender for proposals from other ants? Did they use the best competitive bid? Did they use PERT charts, GANTT charts or other project management techniques? Do they have daily meetings or strategic think weeks to chart their progress?

I watched a program on TV with fascination as the it discussed various aspects of ant behaviour and how they interact.

If humans were to create one of the ant colonies found in the Argentine pampas with the intricacy and manpower needed it would be a wonder of the world.

Yet ants achieve this constantly.

What is the secret to this?

In a nutshell communication and simple rules. Everything is about communication in an ant colony. Ant pheromones signal danger, where the good food is, etc.

Ever notice that when ants meet each other they greet each other with their antennas? That's communication.

Decisions are made democratically. Ants always find the shortest path to a food source based on the density of their pheromone trails.

So the next time you meet a colleague or friend, take time to network with them. That's the secret of the ant.

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A colleague introduced me to Krav Maga, which is a modern martial-art.

It seems that I may pick this as the martial art to learn as it is a real-world martial art. It isn't a sport. There are no competitions and performances. It is a practical self-defense art.

It's been tested on the streets of Tel Aviv and in combat since World War 2.

It teaches you how to handle real-life situations like muggers, armed opponents, being outnumbered, hand grenades, etc and not some theoretical Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon duel situation.

It doesn't involve religious or spiritual elements. In fact, if there is anything spiritually linked to it, was the fact that it was created by an Israeli.

Nasty stuff, reading the articles. It is a no holds barred martial art with an anything goes move. Groin, eyes are not excluded. Weapons, including modern weapons are involved like guns, shotguns, etc. The training also involves it when you are incapacitated or disadvantaged like smoke, dazed, etc.

However, the civilian form taught only involves the self-defense part and not the offensive part (including killing) which commandos and special forces learn. In fact, some countries have legal restrictions on what can be taught.

Scary stuff, indeed.

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Best Manual Speaker 21-Nov-2006
Originally uploaded by nicodemus_chan.

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A very excellent excerpt from Stephen Shields blog during my research on Learned Optimism:

This concept is named after Admiral Jim Stockdale, the celebrated former Vietnam POW. When Jim Collins asked Stockdale who died in POW camp, Stockdale replied (as Collins reports),

"Oh, that’s easy,'" he said. "The optimists.”

“The optimists? I don’t understand,” I said, now completely confused, given what he’d said a hundred meters earlier.

“The optimists. Oh, they were the ones who said, ‘We’re going to be out by Christmas.’ And Christmas would come, and Christmas would go. Then they’d say,‘We’re going to be out by Easter.’ And Easter would come, and Easter would go. And then Thanksgiving, and then it would be Christmas again. And they died of a broken heart.”

Another long pause, and more walking. Then he turned to me and said, “This is a very important lesson. You must never confuse faith that you will prevail in the end—which you can never afford to lose—with the discipline to confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.” (from Good to Great, pp 83ff).

Jim Collins sets forth the principle that I believe fills out a more balanced view of optimism:

Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties

AND at the same time

Confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.

What is variable, then, is not the optimism, but merely whether it's short-term or long-term.

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In a previous post, I wrote that planning triumphs over plain perseverence.

However, how do you plan a game of pool?

If we were to plan a game of pool using traditional project plannng techniques, more time would be spent drawing gantt charts, pert charts, detailing force angle calculations etc. And even then it would come to naught with just a stray shot. In theory if you planned a game of pool properly it would only take 9 shots to complete the game.

Only if the person playing the shots were a world class expert would he be able to do so, and even then only 30% of the time.

I observed this phenomenon while playing pool. I realized that there is a high amount of chaos in pool, and the skill varies amongst players. But sooner or later we all manage to pot all the balls.

The secret I believe is to pot one ball at a time and at most think 1-2 shots away but nothing more.

In a highly chaotic situation like life, we must prepare for chaos by living one day at a time. If we were to plan to pot all the balls perfectly in life, i.e. try to plan each day of our lives 5 years away, we would be under tremendous pressure. But the pressure is lifted when we just play one ball at a time.

Jesus said that we shouldn't worry about tomorrow. Yes planning is important, but if we were to worry, it should only be to accomplish what we have to today.

The next lesson I think is to keep on learning from each shot, learn how the balls move with each shot, how different potting situations come up to, the point of impact of the cue, how hard or fast we pot, the angle of impact and predicting where the ball will hit the sides and come up. We will never learn pool just by watching it. We must play it.

In the same way, we must learn to live life not just by watching (though observing other people's success and failures helps us) but also by doing.

The more we practice living life, the more skillful we are in handling the chaotic situations of life.

Life is not just planning but also of adaptation. Maxwell called his law the law of navigation not the law of planning.
Navigation involves both looking at maps and planning your route, logistics, etc. But it also involves adapting to the circumstances of the sea, the wind, the waves and the weather.

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If you want to write to Santa Claus, he lives in Finland!

His address is:

Joulupukki
96930 Rovaniemi, Napapiiri,

or

Santa Claus
Arctic Circle
96930 Rovaniemi
Finland

Joulupukki is Santa Claus in Finnish.

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No one can tell us what to do.

A lot of people tell us what they want us to do. No matter how moral (teachers, parents) or amoral (bosses, advertisers, marketers, salesmen) or immoral (tricksters, conmen, drug pushers).

But ultimately, we are the only ones who decide what we should do.

The next step of maturity is to realize that we are the ultimate deciders of our actions. As Friedrich Nietzsche noted, "Man is condemned to be free."

We cannot abdicate the throne of our lives.

One interesting thing I finally understand from my experience teaching is that the students in the "naughty class" of schools have realized this. They realize this amazing secret: "No one can tell me what to do."

We can choose to receive advice, we can choose to consult manuals, guidebooks, consult ouija boards, pray to God or gods, but in the end, the decision is ours to make and we are to taste the fruit of it.

But instead of being negative like Nietszche, the gift of freewill is wonderful. Because we are then free to become what God intended us to be. We are not to be molded into what others want us to be, but what God intended us to be, into a unique one-of-a-kind person.

The only one who can be you in the whole history of the universe is you.

That is why I like Bon Jovi's "It's My Life." The song isn't a song of rebellion, but a celebration of uniqueness of our lives.

Lyrics in extended entry.

It's My Life - Jon Bon Jovi

This ain't a song for the broken-hearted
A silent prayer for the faith-departed
I ain't gonna be just a face in the crowd
You're gonna hear my voice
When I shout it out loud

[chorus]

This is for the ones who stood their ground
For Tommy and Gina who never backed down
Tomorrow's getting harder make no mistake
Luck ain't even lucky
Got to make your own breaks

[chorus]

Better stand tall when they're calling you out
Don't bend, don't break, baby, don't back down

Chorus:
It's my life
And it's now or never
['Cause] I ain't gonna live forever
I just want to live while I'm alive
(It's my life)
My heart is like an open highway
Like Frankie said
I did it my way
I just want to live while I'm alive
Last time: 'Cause it's my life!

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I Have Finished The Race!
Originally uploaded by nicodemus_chan.

Finished the 2nd Link Bridge Run in 67 minutes. Could have done it faster if I didn't take breaks along the way to take photos and do live blogging.

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Welcome Back to Singapore!
Originally uploaded by nicodemus_chan.

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Halfway
Originally uploaded by nicodemus_chan.

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Toilet Queue
Originally uploaded by nicodemus_chan.

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Waiting For Shuttle Bus
Originally uploaded by nicodemus_chan.

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Is there a great scorekeeper out there keeping track of all the good and bad that we do?

If we kick a dog today, will a dog one day bite us 20 years later?

How many karma points does it take to go to heaven? And is there special dispensation for those on the borderline?

Is there someone out there really "keeping a list, checking it twice, (and) gonna find out who's naughty and nice?"

The concept of karma may be summed up in the everyday phrase, "What goes around, comes around."

There are many similarities to karma in the Bible, Galatians 6:7 "Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows." Ecclesiastes 11:1 "Cast your bread upon the waters, for after many days you will find it again." Luke 6:38 "Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you."

Practisioners of karma I would say are invoking one of God's laws. The law of the harvest. They are mindful of not mocking God, even though they may not know who He is fully.

I should say even that we should be mindful not just of not doing evil, but of sowing goodness around us. I think humans (including this author) aren't sowing enough goodness in our words and deeds.

Step number 8 of the 12 Step program of Alcoholics Anonymous is "Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all." (Which Zacchaeus in the Bible did by repaying back all those he cheated 4 times. Luke 19:8. Which leads me think: If we are truly transformed by an encounter with Jesus we will sow good deeds and make amends.)

However, karma breaks down in the face of grace and mercy. What happens when we have really committed a grievous sin, like murder? Being nice to everyone around you cannot bring back the dead. Blood is on the muderer's hands. How much time do you have left on death row to accumulate enough good karma to balance the bad karma you have accumulated?

This is where grace and mercy come in. The "good" thief besides Jesus' cross knew the many sins he had committed, and knew the earthly punishment he was receiving was his just desserts. The only thing he realized in his dying moments was that Jesus was the King of kings and the Lord of Lords. And he made only one request, that Jesus remember him.

And this is where the story gets juicy. With that one request he is "rewarded" with paradise. No good deeds needed. No penance to pay. Just one simple humble request to Jesus to remember him. Sins and bad karma all wiped out.

Karma is like Newtonian Laws versus Einstein's Theory of Relativity. In everyday life the law of harvest works. But when it comes to reaching the ends of the universe, it breaks down miserably. Noone can totally wipe out his list of bad things, though some people like Earl (from the TV show "My Name is Earl" tries to do so). And that's where the source of grace, love and peace comes in.

"through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death." (Romans 8:2)

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Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi calls this state of optimal performance "flow".

How do we achieve flow?

1. Skills are needed.
2. There are achievable goals.
3. Rules provide focus of energy and boundaries of control.
4. Quick feedback is evident to the person.
5. We are able to control actions.

Almost any activity can achieve flow, knitting, praying, gardening, walking, even sex!

Flow is the optimal state where the task is neither too simple that it becomes boring, nor too difficult that we become discouraged.

I believe that we must manage our tasks and activities in all areas to be optimal. And managers of other people should attempt to create flow conditions for subordinates. Often workers don't have adequate skills, get none or negative feedback, the goals are unrealistic or rules and guidelines are not clearly communicated or implemented or they are not given authority and power to do their job.

To achieve flow, attention is needed, we should not be distracted by other things in our mind and just concentrate on what is essential. Remember our mind has limited capacity.

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Salsa Havana
Originally uploaded by nicodemus_chan.

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Perhaps one of the antogonistic values in entrepreneurship is creating art versus making a profit.

The artist is more concerned about creating art but may starve because no one buys his/her work. While the profiteer tries to palm off as much as he can to unsuspecting customers.

The answer in solving this dillemma is to create value and to educate people on value.

Value is subjective. Much like the adage, if a tree falls down in the forest does it make a noise?

A piece of art may double or triple in value the next day just because the artist died of a pulmonary heart attack. The molecules in the piece of art didn't change, the world's climate didn't change. It is merely the perception of value.

Value only exists in the mind of the beholder. It is abstract, unreal in the sense of not being physical. And people pay for value. People pay for an abstraction.

Even a car would be valueless in a nation of blind and deaf men. It is only if the buyer believes that anything he pays for has value would he pay for it.

Therefore, in order to be entrepreneurial we create value. We find or create some product of service that in the mind of the buyer is of value, that is the seller moves towards the buyer. Secondly, we can market and advertise or sell the product, i.e. bring the buyer towards the seller by creating more value in his mind about our product.

In the first, we know of Google and Microsoft. In the second, we know of Pet Rocks, and Insurance.

The artist creates art for himself and his own satisfaction, and that is fine if all he wants is to do it for himself. But to sell it involves a second party which is the buyer, and it is in the buyer's mind whether he believes that that piece of art is of value.

As a buyer we must beware of profiteering. That is when there are so many alternatives of the same value available. Caveat emptor is the key word as a seller can label anything with a price, but we as the buyer are the ones who chooses to place value and who ultimately forks over our hard earned dollar. Does Nike profiteer versus an alternative unbranded shoe, or is it selling value? We pay more for better quality. But a bad buy is when the are cheaper alternatives of better quality and of lower price or in reality does not really satisfy our needs.

The profiteer is one who preys on weak and unsuspecting customers and hides information, uses pressure and psychological tactics to sell rather than to create value in the mind of the customer.

I believe it all comes down to serving the customer. Choosing exorbitant prices may work in the short term but it will hit the seller back in the long run unless he/she serves the customer. Walmart is an example of serving the customer by finding ways to source for the cheapest products for the customer.

The entrepreneur serves by creating value for the customer.

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Toastmasters
Originally uploaded by nicodemus_chan.

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1. Ethos: which is your credibility. You words are more influential if your credibility and credentials are apparent to the audience.
2. Pathos: which is the emotional appeal. Some examples are loyalty, patriotism, and heroism.
3. Logos: which is logic and argument. It uses facts, statistics and other forms of evidence to convince the audience.

A good speaker uses all 3 in various combinations depending on the audience. Obviously speaking to a technical person would use facts, figures, "his language". But speaking to women or decision makers may involve appeals to prestige, ego, pride.

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USJ 10km Run Finish Line
Originally uploaded by nicodemus_chan.

Ran the Subang Jaya 10km run in about 63 minutes.

My best time ever for 10km.

I actually managed to sprint to the finish line. Perhaps partly due to the fact that I set the Mortal Kombat soundtrack to the last km, this increased my speed by a couple of km. Music does help!

An interesting observation is that I when I drank the Ribena and Milo offered at the finish line, it was horrendously sweet! It seems your tongue is telling you it needs water and not sugar.

Drinking the very same Ribena later that night and it didn't seem as sweet.

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Workout on 4 Nov 2006
Originally uploaded by nicodemus_chan.

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Time to buy another game?
Originally uploaded by nicodemus_chan.

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Workout on 2 Nov 2006
Originally uploaded by nicodemus_chan.

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Workout Training
Originally uploaded by nicodemus_chan.

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