Live Life With No Regrets!

That is how you must play in the league of life.

Get consistent results, win and fight every day tooth and nail. Play with character.

Even if you're not getting consistent results at first, fight, fight and fight. Just like the bottom teams of the league are fighting against relegation, it's not over till the fat lady sings. Look at West Bromwich Albion last season when they were the first team to shrug off the Christmas curse by being bottom of the league at the end of the year and yet survived on the final day. Look at Middlesborough which this season seemed to be headed to the relegation zone, but defeated Chelsea and are now in the round-of-16 in the UEFA cup.

For I am already being poured out like a drink offering, and the time has come for my departure. I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day—and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing.

(2 Timothy 4:6-8)

Posted by Nico at 2:15 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

One of the problems in life that we get into is the vicious cycle of depression.

The problem with the cycle is this, you are unsuccessful, you get depressed. Because you are depressed you don't attempt to reach your goals fully. And because of that, you get poor results. And the cycle continues.

Conversely, the virtuous cycle is one where success breeds success. You attempt something, you are successful, you become more confident, and your next effort is easier, you do better, you do it more enthusiastically, there will be people who will even help you. Because of that, you get even more success!

So what do we do if we're stuck in the vicious cycle?

The magic word is: "Perhaps".

Set small goals for yourself, and then say, "perhaps if I do this", "perhaps if I try it differently" by doing so you will be getting yourself into the virtuous cycle.

Don't give up. Your faith will reward you. Hope and faith work together.

And a woman was there who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years. She had suffered a great deal under the care of many doctors and had spent all she had, yet instead of getting better she grew worse. When she heard about Jesus, she came up behind him in the crowd and touched his cloak, because she thought, "If I just touch his clothes, I will be healed." Immediately her bleeding stopped and she felt in her body that she was freed from her suffering.

(Mark 5:25-29)

Posted by Nico at 12:45 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

1. How long do you hold on to grudges?
a) A day.
b) A week.
c) A month.
d) A year.
e) A decade.
f) A lifetime.
g) Generations.

2. Rank the following as the best way to resolve differences:
a) Mediation
b) Suicide bombing
c) Unforgiveness
d) Revenge.
e) Forgiveness.
f) Staging demonstrations.
g) Inciting others to hate them as well.

3. Rank The Following According To Level of Offensiveness:
a) Someone insults your religion.
b) Burning your country's flag.
c) Death threats to genocide your entire race.
d) Your embassy being stormed.
e) Bloggers.
f) Free speech advocates.
g) Terrorists.

4. Do you think thinking should be allowed?
a) Yes.
b) No.
c) I'm not allowed to think about thinking.

5. At what point will your anger be quenched?
a) Only when he is dead.
b) Only when his family is dead.
c) Only when his entire race is dead.
d) Only when he gets down on his knees and crawls to me begging for forgiveness.
e) Only until I get the entire world to agree with me that I was right.
f) Only if I change.

Posted by Nico at 9:38 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

You see the sign above at City Hall MRT Station and think..."Chelsea?"

[For the uninitiated, Stamford Road + North Bridge Road = Stamford Bridge. Stamford Bridge is the playing ground for the Chelsea football team in England.]

Posted by Nico at 9:38 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

The greatest single cause of atheism in the world today
Are Christians who acknowledge Jesus with their lips
Then walk out the door and deny him by their lifestyle.
That is what an unbelieving world simply finds unbelievable.

DC Talk, "What If I Stumble"

It doesn't cost anything to become a Christian, just say the sinner's prayer and you've got a ticket to heaven.

Yet, it costs everything to be Christian. You have to leave everything behind, and follow him.

And that is one of the paradoxes of Christianity.

I find that the church today emphasises the free gift of salvation too much at the expense of the cost of discipleship.

Salvation then becomes one of the items ticked off your "to-do" list. I'm saved, I'm okay, I'm going to heaven, hurray!

But the thing is salvation isn't just a decision you make today and get over with, like some kind of chore that you had to do.

Deciding to be a Christian isn't the same as deciding to take out the garbage.

Deciding to be a Christian is more like deciding to get married. It's a serious decision. It's a decision that will change your life. Very much.

A lot of people in the church are too complacent about their positions. We aren't seeking to be better, to be holier.

I would say to a lot of people now, "Think twice before you want to become a Christian".

"If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters—yes, even his own life—he cannot be my disciple. And anyone who does not carry his cross and follow me cannot be my disciple." (Luke 14:26-27)

The Great Commission has been watered down. Instead of going into the world to create disciples, we go out into the world to create converts.

Frankly, I am not overjoyed by the number of people "saved". I'm more concerned by the number of people choosing to follow Jesus.

A lot of people want Jesus to be their saviour, not many want Jesus to be their Lord.

I think of evangelism efforts more circumspectly now, I fear of the church falling into the same trap as the Pharisees:

"Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You travel over land and sea to win a single convert, and when he becomes one, you make him twice as much a son of hell as you are." (Mathew 23:15)

Jesus wasn't concerned with numbers of converts as disciples, he didn't chase after the rich man who was still held by his riches (Mark 10:21-23) (but he still loved him), he layed the cost and told people to decide.

Posted by Nico at 6:27 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Find your ideal body measurements, i.e. your genetic potentail here: http://www.trulyhuge.com/fitnesscalculators.htm.

My wrist is about 6.3".

Therefore my ideal measurements (if I were to target to look like a bodybuilder) are:

Chest: 41.2
Forearm: 12.0
Waist: 28.8
Thigh: 21.8
Hip: 34.9
Calves: 13.9
Bicep: 14.8
Neck: 15.2

I am waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay off target.

Posted by Nico at 1:13 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

You must join the dance. You cannot stop dancing halfway and sulk in a corner.

One partner doesn't start blaming the other just because they are beginners. Concentrate on making the dance beautiful. The more experienced partner must try to cover up the mistakes of the other partner so as to make her look good.

In a dance, the lead must be aware of the surroundings and take precautions, he leads the way, just as in marriage the man must be the lead. You cannot have both take the lead.

Communication is one of the key elements in a dance. It's with the hand signals, the gentle but firm pressure on the back, that gives the signal for the women.

There is also the rhythm to communication, just as there is in dance. Get a rhythm in your relationships so that there is dynamism in your relationships, so that there is movement. Even the universe has its own rhythms.

Almost all relationships have some form of give and take. You don't keep accounts on who has done this or that, it is the end result that matters most, have you danced with passion and have you made the dance beautiful?

Posted by Nico at 12:39 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

The world is your campus.

Everywhere there are new things to learn, laboratories in science, sociology, economics abound. I happen to be living in the Singapore branch.

Everyone around you is a classmate, someone new to meet and enjoy life together.

Posted by Nico at 10:30 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

There is one idea that is sometimes propogated that personality and character are two different things. A lot of books says that develop character rather than personality. However the division of character and personality is vague at best. Where does character end and personality start? Is a smile the sign of just a charming personality or a reflection of his heart?

Stephen Covey battles the idea of the personality ethic by emphasizing the character ethic in his book "7 Habits of Highly Effective People".

I am starting to disagree with him on the separateness of the character ethic and the personality ethic. Building your character will affect your personality. People cannot touch, taste or see or hear what is inside your heart, they can only see your actions and the words you say.

Furthermore, doing good even if you don't feel like doing it will slowly start to make you become good. The more and more you do good, the more and more you become good. You cannot wait for some "inner feeling" to do good. Sometimes we must act "as if".

Just saying "I want to be nice" isn't enough. How do you become nice? This intention must be translated to concrete actions, gestures, words and deeds in the real world.

Covey's message really is Jesus' words that the inside must be clean instead of just the outside. But Jesus didn't say clean the inside only. He said clean both the inside and the outside.

Posted by Nico at 1:50 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

"So do you think I look fat in this dress?"

That's a question perhaps that some guys have to contend with.

What is being honest? And when do you keep a secret?

In war, you have to keep secrets, Sun Tzu said that all war is based on deception. You must not let your enemy know your intentions beforehand. And war is waged in many areas, business, and love among them.

Secrets are needed to protect. Secrets protect a person from harm, from people who would want to exploit that for their own gains. Secrets are used to manoeuvre yourself into a better position, to allow you to gain the upper-hand.

In the Bible, the spies who went to Jericho had to do so in secret. Samson had to keep the source of his strength secret. Esther kept her background secret in the courts of the king.

Keeping secrets is not dishonesty. Honesty can be defined as not lying, nor stealing or attempting to deceive.

So what then is secrecy? Isn't it an attempt to deceive?

Proverbs 11:13 says "A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy man keeps a secret."

Jesus told us that our giving should be done in secret. (Matt 6:3-4)

Even the Father keeps secrets from man, including the day of Judgment, that even Christ himself does not know.

Jesus went to the feast of the tabernacles in secret. (John 7:10)

So then, what about honesty? The 10 commandments plainly state that we cannot be false witnesses.

Perhaps the answer lies in what is the more righteous thing to do as well as the timing. As Solomon says in Ecclesiastes there is a time for everything.

Are we keeping secrets to protect dignity or to hide sin? Are we showing discretion or living in fear? Are the consequences of honesty worse where it may cause more harm or injury than the consequences of secrecy? Will my words and action build up someone or will it tear him or her down?

Perhaps it can be summed up, what is the most loving thing to do. Not the least painful nor the least hurtful, but what is the most loving thing.

Posted by Nico at 12:14 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

The added incentive was that they were offering the best question each month an Ipod shuffle. Not wanting to walk away from such a great incentive and being the mischievous person that I am, I thought of what to ask. I discarded philosophical questions like "What is the meaning of life" or "what is the ultimate purpose of the universe".

Being Valentine's day, I asked two questions:

"How do you win a woman's heart?"

and the second, which I truly do not know the answer for:

"How is it that a woman can hold a grudge against someone for 20 years, even until they die?"

The reply that came in yesterday was:...

"How do you win a woman's heart?":

Dear Nicodemus Chan
Please refer to your above enquiry on ASK! form at Jurong Regional Library

You may find the answer from the titles below, please browse shelves at the Adult section of the libraries, examples are:
· The heart of a woman ( 818.5409 ANG )
· Get Smart with your heart: guide to love, lust and lasting
relationships. ( 306.7 LOP)
Soul Talk by Nina Atwood ( 306.7 ATW )

Please check the availability of the titles above via online NLB catalogue
at .

Online resources:
Databases (like Encyclopaedia Britannica Online, ProQuest and FACTIVA) can only be accessed in the libraries.

Kind Regards
XXXXXXX XXX XXXX
Librarian
Adult and Young Peoples Services

"How can a woman hold a grudge against someone for 20 years, even until they die?"

Dear Nicodemus Chan
Please refer to your enquiry on the ASK! form.
We are unable to verify the answer to this, however we would like to recommend some titles of related subject for your reading pleasure :

For books on this subject ( Class no. 301.4 and 302.34), please browse shelves at the Adult and Reference section of the libraries, examples are:
On Understanding Women ( R 301.412 BEA )
Women's spirituality ( 291.44082 FAU )
Women talk conversation women friends ( R 302.346082 COA )

Please check the availability of the titles above via online NLB catalogue
at .

Kind Regards
XXXXXXX XXX XXXX
Librarian
Adult and Young Peoples Services
_________________________________

On hindsight, maybe I should have tried, "How can I get the number of that cute librarian there with the long hair and turtleshell glasses?"

Posted by Nico at 11:44 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Does the education system in Singapore or Malaysia produce talent or economic units?

Each year, some chap in MOE liaises with the EDB and other government ministries to decide how many skilled workers or people trained in some discipline are needed. By that, they then set quotas for whatever courses to offer, create new courses, etc.

When I was teaching, the 95% of the students didn't want to take the course they were taking. It wasn't their 2nd choice, nor their 3rd choice, nor even their 12th choice! They never put it on their list of 12 choices of courses they wanted to take!

No wonder its so hard to find talent. You cannot force or develop talent, you must nourish and grow, not pack people into courses because the economic forecasts says the country needs X number of so-and-so skilled workers.

And that is why Singapore needs to look for talent outside. Because its education system, though very successful in making drones and scholars, doesn't create stars. No Tiger Woods, no Bill Gates, no Steve Jobs, no Serena Williams could ever have developed in Singapore.

Serena Williams would probably be at some machine tool workstation having studied in ITE.
Bill Gates would be a successful scholar working in some government ministry.
Tiger Woods, would be forced to "concentrate on his studies" because golf would just be a pastime for him.
Steve Jobs would be branded a loser and a waste of his parents money for dropping out of school.

And why?

Because the incentive for headmasters and principals here isn't in producing talent, it's in producing a 100% pass score in their O level results or A level results.

It's in teachers getting a decent passing mark for their students and in keeping the class quiet.

Posted by Nico at 1:43 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

In your personal finances, besides, rent, groceries, living expenses, tithes and offerings, make sure you budget in education.

Spend a certain amount on self-improvement like language courses, music lessons, dance lessons, rock-climbing, fencing, kendo, business classes or what-not.

We must improve each year despite our heavy schedules.

Posted by Nico at 10:35 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

God hates divorce.

But it is a necessary evil, or to put it another way, the lesser of two evils.

Frankly, I do not understand divorce, and I understand divorce at the same time.

First of all, I understand--after having rented a room from a horrible landlady for 3 months--what it is to live under the same roof of a ungracious, rude and petty woman. Her character came through in the way she dealt with the people around her, not just me but also her son, projecting her frustrations, and problems onto him. I stayed out more, watched soccer matches at coffee shops till late and dreaded returning back to my rented room. At one point, I felt like saying, "I finally know why your husband divorced you!!!!". Of course, I kept that to myself. :)

I pity the son even more. For when I can move out, he cannot.

I do not understand divorce because, what problem is there that cannot be solved in a marriage? What problem, what attitude, what object is there that cannot be removed or changed?

So, coming back to the question, what problem is there that God cannot solve? Nothing, except the hearts of men. Because men have free will, He cannot intervene.

Stubbornness, pride, unforgiveness, denial are the obstacles that stand in the way. No one can change a person except him or herself.

So even if one party changes but the other continues to injure the other one, divorce happens.

Jesus said that God hates divorce but allowed for divorce because of the stubbornness of hearts.

It is not in Gods will or plan for divorce, but at times it is a necessary evil.

I once asked a group of friends of mine why are there Christians who divorce? The reaction had a touch of patronisation. They were lawyers, in their course of work they hand encountered many Christian couples who had divorced. The reason for this is that in my mind "Christian" means one thing and another to them.

"Christian" means to me people who truly make Jesus their Lord and saviour. "Christian" to my listeners mean people who have "Christian" written in the religious column of the application forms or who go to church in body but do not worship in spirit and in truth.

I asked another lawyer friend of mine, and he said "Of course! If a couple submitted to Christ, there would never be any divorce."

Therefore, in marriage, Christ must truly be the Lord. The husband and the wife each must submit to God, instead of letting their own pride be their master. When hearts are submitted before Christ, all things are possible.

Posted by Nico at 2:27 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

In Marketing, there is a concept called making the intangible tangible. An example would be a hotel in order to show that it emphasises cleanliness may put a protective paper wrap around the toilet bowl after it is cleaned. Just cleaning the toilet bowl isn't enough, it must be seen by the customer in order for him/her to perceive and appreciate the effort it went through.

Love is an abstract an intagible thing. Just saying "I love you" having feelings for someone or having an intention isn't enough. Al Capone believed that he was a kind and nice person despite ordering the killings of anyone who got in his way. A lot of alcoholics have feelings of love for their families but did not make the intangible tangible and continue in their ways.

It may be enough for yourself, but for the other people, abstract things must be made tangible.

Just like an idea in your brain, remains an idea unless implemented, any feelings and intentions that we feel or think for others must be expressed through the physical world through atoms, photons and sound waves.

"What good is it, my brothers, if a man claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save him? Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to him, "Go, I wish you well; keep warm and well fed," but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead." (James 2:14-17)

So when we love the people around us, make sure that you make the intangible tangible. Gifts, cards, a thank-you note, a voucher, something that is tangible realizes what was created in the realm of Logos into the physical world.

Posted by Nico at 3:59 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

I am still amazed at the way HR works in evaluating other people. Most general methods in HR for selecting people are so primitive!

1) Age/Years of experience. This is like saying I want 10 litres of Orange. But is it orange juice, orange concentrate, raw oranges, with pulp or no pulp. Years of experience though useful as a general yeardstick is a very bad indicator of performance ability.

2) Last Drawn Salary. Another way of evaluating the worth of someone. But if that person is very good but just unlucky in the promotion sweepstakes or absolutely worthless but just very good at politicking his way up the ladder? I find this one of the most stupidest ways of evaluating someone.

3) Academic Grades. He may be good at studies, but is he good at being effective?

Posted by Nico at 12:56 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Having an MP3 player to jog with is a good motivator in jogging.

Having some hard rock songs gives you the extra spurt when jogging.

Here's my list of jogging songs.

The Cup of Life - Ricky Martin
Winter Games - David Foster
Eye of the Tiger (Rocky Theme) - Survivor
Reach - Gloria Estefan
Faith of the Heart (ST:Enterprise Theme) - Russel Watson
Song 2 - Blur
The Power of the Dream - Celine Dion
All For One, All For Love - Bryan, Adams, Rod Steward, Sting
Techno Syndrome (Mortal Kombat) - The Immortals

I like the Mortal Kombat theme, it can actually give me a speed boost, doubling my speed when I play it.

There aren't too many Christian songs for jogging, the pace is too slow and can actually slow you down. The best I've used are the following list, however I've to get my hands on some real hard Christian rock like Petra. Recommendations anyone?

All Things Are Possible - Hillsongs
I Believe The Promise - Hillsongs
Give You My Heart - Hillsongs
Every Move I Make - Out of Eden
God of Wonders - Cliff Young
He Will Carry You - Scott Wesley Brown

Posted by Nico at 9:12 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

What matters, therefore is not the meaning of life in general but rather the specific meaning of a person's life at a given moment.

To put the question in general terms would be comparable to the question posed to a chess champion: "Tell me, Master, what is the best move in the world?"

There simply is no such thing as the best or even a good move apart from a particular situation in a game and the particular personality of one's opponent.

The same holds for human existence. Once should not search for an abstract meaning of life.

Everyone has his own specific vocation or demands fulfilment. Therein he cannot be replaced, nor can his life be repeated. Thus, everyone's task is as unique as is his specific opportunity to implement it.

As each situation in life represents a challenge to man and presents a problem for him to solve, the question of the meaning of life may actually be reversed.

Ultimately, man should not ask what the meaning of his life is, rather he must recognize that is is he who is asked. In a word, each man is questioned by life; and he can only answer to life by answering for his own life; to life he can only respond by being responsible.

Thus, logotherapy sees in responsibleness the very essence of human existence.

Posted by Nico at 9:59 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Take $50 from your wallet.

Say to yourself, I will turn this $50 into $100.

Give yourself 1 month to do it.

See Matthew 25:14-28

Posted by Nico at 12:52 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Spain's El Pais prints front page Mohammad cartoon - Yahoo! News

It makes you wonder about when Christians have cartoons lampooning them over creationism and when people use "Jesus Christ" as a swear word they don't get offended or overlook it. (See Proverbs 19:11)

Just to digress, have you ever wondered why people can use "Jesus Christ!!!" as a swear word but people don't say "Muhammad!" or "Buddha!" or "Lao Tzu!" or "Confucius!" or "or "Moses!" as a swear word?

What is so different about Christ from the other prophets that make him so special that only He is used as a swear word? Something for you to think about...

Posted by Nico at 1:05 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

I chose them because it reminded me of Proverbs 3:3-4

Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. Then you will win favor and a good name in the sight of God and man.

(Putting a wristband looks a lot cooler though than putting it around your neck in today's culture though :)

Search for "love and faithfulness" in the Bible. (NIV)
Search for "love and faith" in the Bible. (NIV)

Posted by Nico at 12:32 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

No TV or fast food for 1 month. It's going to be real funny if I actually do watch TV or tuck into some fast food. But I did it, 31 days without the goggle box or oily fat laden food.

Now, the next months goals will be:

1) No mindless Internet surfing. I.e. Only go to websites that are relevant to work.
2) 8 glasses of water a day plus 2 servings of fruit/vegetables a day.

I truly believe that in each one of us no matter how significant we think we are, there is a diamond that is already there, its just the pieces of ground around it that is covering the sparkle. Wash out the ground and it will show the reason why God would die on the cross for us.

Posted by Nico at 12:31 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)